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History Lesson- AJ Holmes

Hello class. Welcome to History 101. Today you’re going to get an overview of American Culture. Now “American” is defined as a citizen or native of the United States.

That’s all of you!
Except for Timble, we’ll talk about it later. Now culture is defined as a refined understanding or appreciation of the arts and of the manifestations of human intellectual achievements regarded collectively. 
Follow so far?
In 1492, Columbus sailed the ocean blue.
He had a crippling vice for a fancy Indian spice.
So he knew what he had to do.
Then he landed here in America, 
No spices so instead,
He did something original and killed all the Aboriginals!
Yeah, he left them all for dead.
And that’s how Columbus discovered America!
What’s that Jacob? Your dad told you something different? Well is your dad a teacher? No he’s not! No he’s not! Why don’t you shut the hell up and let me finish my lesson.
It’s the culture of America
We’ll sing it all day long.
It’s the culture of America,
Cause we are never wrong. Sing class!
It’s the culture of America (come on)
We’ll sing it all day long. ( I can see you)
It’s the culture of America, 
Cause we are never wrong.
If you don’t shape up, you’re getting an F.
Now in 1776, We were having some conflicts,
With a mother country who wanted us to die.
So we killed all the redcoats.
Yeah, we slit open their throats
And that’s called the Fourth of July.
That’s why we have fireworks!
Now who knows any other events in American History? Jacob? The Trail of Tears?
(Awkward silence)
It’s the culture of America
We’ll sing it all day long.
It’s the culture of America,
Cause we are never wrong.
Now in a place called Gitmo Bay, 
We keep bad people away.
Sure they didn’t do anything wrong,
But that’s still where they belong.
So raise a flag and shout hooray!
That’s called freedom!
This will all be on the test, I hope you’re taking notes.
Oh and Jacob? Someone from the government is here,
They’ve been looking at your text messages to Tina. They have some questions. 
It’s the culture of America
We’ll sing it all day long.
It’s the culture of America,
Cause we are never wrong.
LAST TIME!
It’s the culture of America, and we’ll—
ALL RIGHT, THAT’S IT! If you don’t sing, I’m not finishing this song! And I’m not leaving the stage. You’ve heard it 3 times by now, it’s up to you to sing. Will you sing? If you sing, you won;t look stupid, this isn’t television, it’s history.
It’s the culture of America
We’ll sing it all day long.
It’s the culture of America,
Cause we are never wrong.
Class Dismissed!

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    Oh AJ, how I adore the!
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most people who think they're happy are really just stupid.

I'm lame, idk.
Gabbie. 16. I'm usually crying over fictional characters. Also, I'm attending LeakyCon 2014. Yeehaw.
||| previously nothingsevergonnatakeusdown & darrenosnes |||

I'm just a Hufflepuff.